joanneeeee

2012-01-27T12:12:00.006+08:00

"If I, Your Lord, have served you, then you ought to serve each other." John 13:34

There have been many times where I do something for another person and tell myself that it's because I'm nice, it's because I love the person, and I don't mind doing it to make the other person feel happy. But as I did QT today, I found a whole new reason to serve others. Because God served us first.

Many times when I'm serving others, be it backup singing for church, or teaching sunday school, or baking for refreshments, I always think of it as doing something for that person. But actually, I'm serving God aren't I? Every single note I try to hit, every single story I tell the kids, every piece of dessert I bake, it's all for him. And many times I forget that. I forget that I'm not doing this for the worship leaders or the kids or the congregation. I'm doing this for God. But how many times have I wound up focusing so much on the person I think I'm supposed to please that I forget, it's all about God.

And God doesn't care whether I'm pitch perfect, He doesn't care if I'm doing cool or boring craft, He doesn't care if the food is nice or not. He cares about my heart. And every single time I've served in church, my heart hasn't been right. I've been trying to please the wrong group of people.

Why did I fight so hard not to bake the brownies that day? I don't know. When I had that conversation with Ian, I didn't think about any of this. I just knew that deep inside, I shouldn't be baking it. There was something telling me not to. And maybe it's because my heart wasn't right. I wasn't gonna be doing it for the right reasons. But as the youth sunday approaches, God I pray, help me to know, it's all about You. Help me keep in mind that it doesn't matter how many people like or dislike it, only You matter. I pray that I won't get sidetracked by the approval of men, and forget that Yours is all I need.

2012-01-26T12:37:00.003+08:00

OMG I TOTALLY FORGOT TO ADD,

I watched A Cinderella Story: Once Upon A Song tooooo!

Basically it's A Cinderella Story 3! (Because Hilary Duff was such a hit and they just had to make two more movies after the first one hahahahahahahaha)

It was quite nice, though everything was expected, but I didn't know Lucy Hale could sing!!!

And her voice is so good! But Ashley Benson's so much prettier though (Probably because she's a blond and I'm biased towards blonds)

ANYWAY.

Soooo last night my internet was down and I was so freaking pissed so I decided to buy the new episode of GG instead of illegally watching it.

It's so ironic how Dan no longer loves Serena yet Serena is doing all she can to make him fall in love with her again because she's finally realised that the two of them were meant to be together! It's like the total opposite of Season 1! Dan used to do all he can to attract Serena's attention but she didn't care, and now HAH, KARMA'S A BITCH.

And it's so sad because Serena was like "With Gossip Girl no longer around, all my relationships are starting to flourish!" And Dan was like, "What relationship? You mean our FAKE relationship?" And Serena'a all heartbroken because she's really enjoying all this time spent with Dan yet Dan's just doing all this for Blair because he's still utterly in love with Blair.

Howeverrrrrr, Blair doesn't give a shit about Dan because she's too busy choosing between Chuck and Louie! If Blair chooses Dan in the end, and Serena is left with Nate, I WILL KILL THE GOSSIP GIRL WRITERS. Because Dan was always meant to be with Serena and Blair with Chuck and Louie can go kill himself which will make Beatrice happy, and since Jenny is banished from all of Manhattan, then Nate can go with... Vanessa. Or whichever woman he wants since Vanessa is younger than him and he tends to go for women twice his age.

And yet again I was ranting about Gossip Girl because I'm obsessed with it.

Hahahahahaha sorry.

Idk

2012-01-25T21:58:00.001+08:00

Recently I've been feeling moody and unhappy and just not as happy as other people think I should be.
I mean, it's the holidays, I should be partying and going out and wtv. But I don't feel like it.

For example during CNY at Jess and Kell's place, everyone else was having a good time playing slapjack and stuff but I just wasn't in the mood to be all high and noisy and happy.

And like for the youth Sunday normally I'd be so excited about it, whether the refreshments or worship or welcoming or anything, but this time I'm not.

It's like every time something fun comes along, my mind drifts back to my 15 points. How I should be sad and disappointed and crying, not just accepting it and moving on.

I feel guilty for it, even though I think I've done my best. I really gave it my all, I really thought that I would succeed this time. But I guess God had other plans in mind.

I don't know what to do about it, maybe I'm just getting tired of putting up this facade all the time.

Maybe deep down inside, I know I don't deserve to be happy.

2012-01-24T23:48:00.002+08:00

So thanks to SOPA, almost every website that I used to go to to watch my shows and movies are all gone!

G O N E .

However, on the plus side, I somehow managed to watch several movies in the past few days!

Likeeeeeeee.

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 1 & 2!

I read the second book before I even knew there were movies,

so I was kinda lost at first, but honestly, it's a good show.

Well. For teenage girls like me anyway.

It was so real that I could connect to each of the girls in someway or another.

Of course, I absolutely L O V E D Bridget because she was played by the one and only Blake Lively, who, if you don't know this already, is JAW-DROPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL, but the other three girls were fabulous too.

It was so sad though, had me tearing at several moments, but luckily I was watching it at 2am and probably everyone else in the household was sleeping!

OH OH OH and how could I forget, I also watched Beauty and the Briefcase!!!!!!!

I first watched it because Hilary Duff was in it (Of course.) but then I ended up loving the show!

It was kind of thought-provoking, and the storyline wasn't all that expected hohoho.

GO WATCH IT, no-lifers who are reading this.

On a totally separate note, there's a BBQ going on at my house on Friday.

Sorta like a pre-jc BBQ where we all start crying and laughing about how our Stmargs days are all over, and we all gotta move on with life.

Started off with 6 people, but now there are like 16 people going, so woohoo!

Hahahaha.

Andand, I've been trying to figure out,

is it 'dream come true' or 'dream come through'?

I mean like both of them make sense, no?

Anyway btmp, thinking about the BBQ..

I think sometimes we hold on to the past so tightly because we're too afraid to face what's coming our way.

2012-01-24T00:56:00.002+08:00

Screw you and your pride, go ahead and be a freaking loner for all I care.

I don't give a shit about you being insecure or having been bullied or whatever freaking excuse that I've forced myself to come up with so that I'd tolerate your attitude anymore.

Go settle your own esteem issues before going around trying to make the whole world miserable because I actually have friends that I can turn to when you're being an ass, but you don't.

I used to be on your side, but not anymore.

I'm done with trying to help you fit in when the shit that comes out of that trashy mouth of yours just pushes everyone else away.

You have no one there for you anymore when you need a listener, a friend, or even a sibling.

Scratch that.

You have no one. Period.

And you only have yourself to blame.

2012-01-24T00:46:00.002+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year guys! (:

Though we might not look at CNY as the New Year and we definitely don't have this huge big countdown party to bring it in, I think CNY is a great time to meet and catch up with relatives that you haven't talked to in a long time, or visit old friends and just have a great time.

This year's CNY was kinda fun; Taught the little cousins how to play mahjong, and Debs and Tabs came over to play mahjong as well! Not with money though since we aren't really supposed to gamble, but well it was fun nevertheless! Games aren't about the money, it's about the fellowship!

Off to MBS, then the Chuas', and then our grandparents' house tomorrow.

新年快乐，万事如意，身体健康，步步高升，心想事成！

HAHAHA.

2012-01-18T22:21:00.002+08:00

KICKING IN THE FRONT SEAT. SITTING IN THE BACK SEAT.
GOTTA MAKE MY MIND UP, WHICH SEAT CAN I TAKEEEEEEE.

IT'S FRIDAY, FRIDAY, GOTTA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY!

Hehehhehe. I know it's wednesday. Shush.

Went to Lynette's house today with Jan,

watched Jane Eyre, Monte Carlo, Apple Of My Eye, and The Devil Wears Prada.

Hahahahaha, totally love Monte Carlo lah,

probably because of Leighton Meester and Selena Gomez, but whatever.

I'm a girl, sue me.

Probably heading down to Stmargs again on friday on CNY, what a nice ex-student!

Training tomorrow though, hope it'll be nice and fun. (:

2012-01-17T23:06:00.003+08:00

Just watched the most recent episode of Gossip Girl, and I FEEL LIKE CRYING ):

It's so sad I can't even imagine to think what I would do if I were in Blair's position!

She has this choice between marrying Louie, because she thinks that God wants her to, or to marry Chuck, but risking his life, since she feels that God will punish her by killing him.

SO SCARY RIGHT.

Hahahaha, okay I'm obsessed.

ON A BRIGHTER NOTE,

Dan and Serena are totally getting back together, no?

#happyhappyhappyhappyhappyhappyhappy

#theyshouldneverhavebrokenup

#theyaretheonlyreasoniwatchgossipgirl

So, after Val stayed over today,

we met Xintian at Bukit Timah Market for brunch/lunch!

Bought back food to my house for our HIGH CLASS PICNIC 2.0!

Played guitar hero after that for like 3 hours,

going crazy over all the songs,

and just having loads of fun!

Had to leave for training though, which wasn't very enjoyable but yeah.

Learned lots of stuff about JC from Chris and Jiaxuan, so that was cool.

But other than that, besides the last 20 mins, I was extremely far away from Lynette and Jy!

SADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.

And some stuff happened but whatever! (:

I have loads of stuff to do tomorrow, all happening concurrently though,

so I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

Hm.

2012-01-16T23:53:00.000+08:00

HEHEHE.

Fixed the camera.

2012-01-16T23:44:00.003+08:00

HAI EVERYONE.

VALERIE LIM LI HUI IS AT MY HOUSE NOW! (:

Toshiba has really bad quality cameras though so just ignore the resolution! (:

GOODNIGHT.

Open House

2012-01-15T09:28:00.003+08:00

OH OH and I forgot to mention that I went to the Rj and Nyjc open house with Joey Jan and Ame!!

Super lots of fun with those three goons, we kept making so much noise and whenever someone gave us that judging look, we'd be like "HEHE WE'RE FROM MGS." OOOPS. Hahaha!

Oh and at Rj we were all declaring "WE GOT 6 POINTS." Hahahaha. Met so many rgps girls there, so paiseh la.

Anyway I haven't posted pictures for a long time I think, so these are photos (+ the post before) from OpenHouse and Wicked that I stole from Facebook through my phone hehehe.

2012-01-15T09:28:00.001+08:00

Results, Wicked.

2012-01-12T16:14:00.002+08:00

To sum up my results in one word,

D I S A P P O I N T I N G .

But I've accepted it, so, well LIFE GOES ON (:

Thankful to God that I successfully DSA-ed into Acjc, so I don't have to freak out over JAE and stuff, and I don't have to submit my 12 choices by tomorrow 4pm!

Since Stmargs didn't do very well, not many people are going there I think,

so next month will be a new beginning with new friends and a new school and new subjects!

I'm hoping to do Lit, ELL, Chem and either Econs or Math, I haven't really decided.

Probably Math though, because I really couldn't care less about Econs.

And if I'm going into Special Ed, then Econs would probably be of no use!

On a happier note, I watched Wicked the Musical yesterday,

with Ian Bry Debs Yong Kitty Ame Jess and Kell!

It was really really awesome,

totally different from just listening to the entire soundtrack, like what I've been doing for the past few weeks/months hehehe.

Defying Gravity was GREAT.

Not flawless, because she missed ONE note, but the effects and lighting was really like, WOW.

Loved For Good, though the whole ambience was disturbed due to some lame guy who coughed, which totally spoiled the sad mood!!

Hm, What Is This Feeling and Popular were SO CUTE.

"LOATHING, UNADULTERATED LOATHING, FOR YOUR HAIR, YOUR VOICE, YOUR CLOTHING!" Hahahahaha.

Andandand Glinda and her "Toss, toss!" and "Noooooooooooo" was super funny!!!

Howeverrrr,

Song that struck me the most, was I'm Not That Girl.

"He could be that boy, but I'm not that girl."

Both times, when Glinda and Elphaba sang it, I really felt like crying because they sounded so rejected and helpless and, yeah.

The whole musical was really great though,

made me feel so many different emotions at the same time!

Bry and I were just saying, Wicked would make a good literature text!

All the themes, characters, and conflicts, SUPER INTENSE.

Hahaha!

Anyway it was a really enjoyable experience, especially with the great company,

so for those who haven't watched it, GO NOW!

$168 WELL SPENT!! (:

Off to training soon, hopefully it'll be much more bearable than before, seeing as we're alllll gonna be teammates!

2012-01-07T10:58:00.003+08:00

Well so I think that the main difference between acjc training and smss training is that I actually enjoyed smss training.

It didn't matter that we had a kinda sucky coach who didn't really know what he was talking about,

or we had juniors who were noisily chattering at the side,

but at least I had the bdiv bowlers who never failed to make every single training extremely fun and full of laughter and joy!

Now at ac it's just like,

"Okay let's awkwardly stare at this angle because I've stared at all the other 359 angles already."

In stmargs, it was like, "Crap it's 6 already? Let's just bowl somemore!"

Now it's "Huh it's ONLY been 3 minutes?!" and I stare at the clock every other minute just to check that I'm getting closer and closer to the time where training ends.

It's not that I hate the school or the bowlers or anything!

They're all nice and stuff.

But it's just, I don't fit in that kinda culture? Idk.

It's just different. And who likes different? ):

Horrible typical teenage girls.

2012-01-04T23:16:00.001+08:00

(Posted on 4 Jan, 9am)
I feel so horrible now because I was just stoning at the bus stop waiting for 961 to come and there was this old lady running after 75 that had just come. And I think she was hoping that I would stand up and ask the bus driver to wait for her, but I just blanked out and stared at everything happening and so the bus drove away just when the old lady reached the busstop ad then she turned to look at me and gave me the "Oh wow you couldn't have just asked them to wait?" look which made me feel like such a horrible typical teenage I-don't-care-about-anyone-else girl.

Lenka

2012-01-04T23:15:00.001+08:00

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle.

Obsessed.

2012-01-04T00:51:00.001+08:00

Oh-Bee-As-Ee-As-As-Ee-Dee.

I MISS KL!

2012-01-04T00:43:00.001+08:00

I miss you guyzxzxzxzx! <3 <3

XINTIANISTHELOVEOFMYLIFE

2012-01-04T00:41:00.001+08:00

So I just had this two hour phonecall with my ex-husband, LEEXINTIAN, and I miss her so freaking much.

It's nice to have someone who's been in the same class and group of friends as you since sec1, so like you can go "Remember this........BLABLABLA" and everything will be fine because we were both there together for so many things! And like all the "You know what I mean?"s that are just unexplainable in words but that someone can just understand it. Get it? Nevermind.

And also I was just keeping all my Christmas cards and reading through all of them for the last time, and practically every card said something like "I love you, and I'll always be there for you!" Or, "If you ever need anyone, I'm just a call or text away.". And I thin about the last time I actually talked to this person and realize, Hey, I haven't seen this person ever since prom! Or, hey, I haven't talked to this person ever since.... I can't remember.

It just doesn't really make sense, like are words just simply words nowadays that small promises like "I'll be there" can just be broken in a matter of MERE SECONDS?

I mean it's not that I've never done such stuff, like I can easily think of five people that I've said stuff like that to and never kept it, but the point is, when did promises become just words that don't mean anything more than what they really are? (Did this sentence make sense at all?)

What are words if you really don't mean them when you say them?

First Training Of The Year

2012-01-03T21:21:00.002+08:00

So today was the first day of school for most people not 17-19 years old this year,

and also the first acjc training of the year!

Started off awkward and boring at first, as usual, but it turned out okay in the end I think!

Don't think I'm ever gonna get used to it though. ):

Anyway,

I HAVE OFFICIALLY FINISHED READING ELIXIR,

which really really sucks because it ends with a freaking cliffhanger.

Clea doesn't end up with Sage, not with Ben either, and Rayna is just, there.

I CAN'T WAIT FOR DEVOTED TO COME, but then again I'm sure it'll end with a cliffhanger too because it's a freaking trilogy!

Grahzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzxzx.

Ah but on the plus side, now that I don't have a book to read,

I'm spending all my time on watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S!

After three days, I'm at.. Season 2 Episode 11!

Not bad righttttttt.
Okay. This just kinda proves how boring my life is. Okay. Bye.

NYR

2012-01-01T22:39:00.001+08:00

New Year Resolutions?
Nahhhhhh, probably never gonna stick to them anyway.

Spent the start of the year with Tabs Debs Ian and Bry, playing guitar hero and throwing stuff down from our balcony to our security guard.
Possibly the first time in a long time (Ever since NZ I think!) that it's been just the five of us, and hopefully there'll be more of these moments to come!!

2012 is gonna be filled with so many new experiences, memories and moments; It's quite daunting to think that in this year, we'll all probably meet the people that we're gonna be friends with for a lifetime, (Well that's what people say), but I guess it's a new beginning.

I'm hoping to stay low-key and slack in jc though, just keeping to my circle of friends and studying hard for a's and leaving jc happily, instead of getting wrapped up in all that friendship drama. Stmargs was enough for me, hopefully acjc (If I get in) will be different.

But well, wherever I end up going this year, and whatever I end up doing, it's all in God's hands, isn't it? I don't know what kind of person I'm going to turn out as, though hopefully a good one, but I trust that God's plans for all of us are far greater than what our puny minds can even TRY to imagine, and with everything I have, I commit it all to Him.

Sibling Bonding

2012-01-01T22:27:00.001+08:00

GREAT WAY TO START THE YEAR HEHEHE.

Post-KL

2011-12-30T01:18:00.001+08:00

PACKING MY ROOM WAS SO FREAKING EXHAUSTING.
Not to mention that I was living on like 3 hours of sleep since I slept at 5 and woke up at 8! I'm surprised I still have the energy to type all this.

I'm so tired of your bitchy moodswings and pretending to be someone I'm not around you. I don't even know why I bother trying to be nice.

KL!

2011-12-30T01:14:00.001+08:00

KL was relatively fun, well maybe not as perfect as I really wanted it to be, but fun enough I guess? Ah idk.
Though there's one scene that'll always be stuck in my head no matter what.

On the last night (now), we were all playing "I have never", and the forfeit was "truth or dare".
Bry lost, and he picked truth, so Jess said "Who is the person you dislike the most?" And then we were like, "If we don't know the person then nevermind!"
But then he said, "Oh that's simple, it's Ian." And he said it in the most obvious tone ever. Like the "Who else can it be?!" kinda way.

And then like we were playing our fake mahjong game (Which was extremely fun btw), and Bry said he didn't like to say "PONG", he wanted to say "Pppppp!" and claimed that it was the same!
Then I said, "You can't just cancel out the ong, otherwise I should just call you Bryan Le."
And he said "You can call me whatever you like, just don't call me your brother."

I mean like wtheck, he'a already 18, I'm 16, Ian's 20, and we were like in front of Kell Jess and Debs. What's his problem, honestly? He's the one that says we don't try very hard to create a happy family, but seriously, is he? Between the things he says and the stuff he does, nobody will EVER think that he loves his family. Yet he always scolds me about it, saying I'm disrespectful and stuff.
At first when I heard it I was quite hurt, like I thought we were done with all that lame shit.
And then after that I felt like, weird? Confused? Or maybe disappointed?
Anyway, that kinda screwed up my night, so I didn't really feel like playing anything with them, and I just kinda stoned in my room. :/

And omg it's freaking 5am now, we're leaving at 9. -.- SO GOODNIGHT. (HOPEFULLY!!!)

Some pictures to end the night!

2011-12-23T02:25:00.002+08:00

So, it's 2.30am and I'm still up trying to finish up christmas cards for Resonate.

It's like santa's mini workshop here, I swear.

Ian Debs and I are all rushing our cards, for the same people haha!

And not to mention,

we all have to wake up early tomorrow to

1) Buy ingredients for baking.

2) EXERCISE AND LOSE OUR FATTZXZXZXZ.

3) Buy stuff for KL!

4) Bake.

We're never gonna wake up on time hahaha.

Anyway,

went to sembawang today to meet Jiayi and Yohanna,

and at the same time I decided to pass Alice and Yasira their cards, +present in A's case.

Omg we looked like fools, typing addresses into iphone maps and trying to find our way around.

It was such a sight for anyone else hehe!

But anyway we managed to find Yasira's letterbox and then I realised that her envelope didn't have her name on it, and we didn't have a pen with us, so we used eyeliner HAHA.

Freaking eyeliner totally screwed up the envelope (Which was probably the only redeeming quality about the card) but ahwell whatever.

Met Alice at sunplaza, then headed to town for cell with Debs and Ame.

We are so sexist, we've never invited the guys out before hahaha.

Celebrated Jiayi's birthday and had a great dinner catching up with them though.

Tomorrow's gonna be a busy day,

though it feels weird not caroling.

Remembering the times where we just sat on the bus going to everywhere and started singing, we might have been a nuisance to the public but who cares, it was probably the best part of christmas!

Ahwell, off to join my fellow elf in completing our work that Santa passed us to do,

these things take the joy out of christmas omg.

Sydney Part 1!

2011-12-17T07:17:00.001+08:00

So well, I'm typing this in the middle of my overseas adventures, while I wait for my parents to find out how to get to the go-karting place.

Sydney has been amazingly fun, and I think the four of us are getting closer to each other by the day. B was being an ass at first, but today he was nice, when he helped me carry my sandboard up the sand dune, because scaling the dune itself was so tiring, and I couldn't make it. Hehehe.

Anyway so for the past few days, we've been to...

The botanic gardens! Many pretty flowers and rocks and not-so-pretty-lizards! We wanted to sit on the steam engine trains but it was closed, so we ended up going to this mini museum like thingy that had all the Australian army stuff like guns and rifles and pistols and tanks and yeah. There was a unloaded gun that I tried using, IT'S FREAKING HEAVY! Like seriously, after shooting once, I had to put it down. Don't understand how army guys do it. Hahaha.

Then... The caves! It was really cool because we had a worship service there, singing all the Christmas carols and stuff. And then we went for some trail around the caves, I'll upload pictures another time.

Next was the Three Sisters! They're basically three kinda sorta cool rocks that are called the three sisters. The scenery is über cool though, especially with all the mist and stuff, I managed to video the clouds moving!!! It's really amazing!!!

And then we headed to hunter valley, which is actually vineyards!!! So we went for tours and stuff, like to find out how wine is made, where, who, and interesting facts like that. B and I also went for a horse ride!!! Not those lame Malaysia ones where you just sit on the horse and let the guide walk the horse, but we sat on our individual horses, the guide just told us "This is short, this is long, pull to stop, kick to go. Okay have fun." And then she went in front on her own horse. So basically we were in total control of the horse. Super fun!! My horse was called Buster, and he was so nice!! B was on Buster's best friend, so we stuck together hahaha!

Oh and also at hunter valley, was the hunter valley Christmas light show! And storybook garden! Super super fantastic place, there were Christmas lights everywhere! And the storybook garden was like basically every childhood story or nursery rhyme we've heard like Alice in Wonderland, Hansel and Gretel, all real life size!!! So we had tea with the Mad Hatter and Georgie Porgie kissed me! It was really fun!

After that we headed to Uncle Sunny and Aunty Juno's house. Their house is so beautiful! And we went for lunch with them. They're such interesting peopleeeeee, and Aunty Juno reminds me of Aunty Em so much! Well they're sisters so yeap hahaha.

Hmmmm, then we went to... Port Stevens! Which is where I am now. Yesterday we went Quad Biking on the sand dunes, which was super duper awesome, like omg the adrenalin when you drive through a sand dune and stuff, woahhhhhhhh. Hahaha! Anyway then we had a BBQ for dinner, daddy and I cooked lamb and sausages!! Super yummyyyy! Hehehe.

After that, this morning we went sandboarding!! It was not as fast as I thought it would be, but it was kinda thrilling! I mean like the sand dunes were quite high, so we had to climb allllll the way up, then slide down! If not for the long climb up, I would have gone like a million times, but I was too lazy to climb up so I only went like 4 times I think. At least I stayed on my board!!! B and Daddy toppled over and were rolling in the deeeeeeep (sand). Hehe. Okay I've reached my destination! Go-Karting here we go!

/edit

So we just finished go-karting and it was SO TIRING. Omg now I really salute Lewis Hamilton and Jenson Button and the rest of the F1 drivers. It was so tiring, and I'm too short so the accelerator was too far away and I had a hard time accelerating, or braking for that matter. B overtook me 7 times I think, and Daddy 3. Wheeeeee. It was a fun and eye-opening experience, but I don't think I'm gonna do that again any time soon!! I'm much better at go-karting on the wii. Hmm.

Well, I'm off to go visit lighthouses and have scones and tea! I'll come back when I don't have anything to do again!
(TYPED ON 15DEC)

2011-12-12T05:46:00.001+08:00

Why do you manage to screw up our family wherever we go?

2011-12-09T16:53:00.001+08:00

Going to the airport nowwwwww, goodbye friends who I'll not see for the next 15 days!

2011-12-09T11:45:00.003+08:00

I don't really give a damn about what you do with your boyfriends,

just don't drag me into it.

And don't even think, for a tiny fraction of your pathetic little life, that I was ever jealous of your relationships with any of them.

So, I'm flying off to Sydney tonight for 12 days!

I'll blog when I have the time.

2011-12-09T11:26:00.001+08:00

An overdose of pain, an onslaught of reality.

2011-12-05T09:10:00.001+08:00

BLAIR IS MOVING IN WITH DAN.
BLAIR AND CHUCK ARE FINALLY BACK TOGETHER.
SOMEONE'S IN A CAR ACCIDENT!
I'll explain more when I finally watch the episode only tomorrow, since I live in annoying Singapore!

DEBBO LEE IS LATE.
So I'm stoning at a hdb void deck waiting for her.
With many old aunties and uncles staring at me.

2011-11-29T20:42:00.002+08:00

Prom was freaking fantastic.

That's all I have to say about it!

I'll post the pictures later.

SPENT THE NIGHT WITH SARAH AMELIA XINTIAN KIANA! (:

LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE ALL FOUR OF YOU LOVELIES.

And,

Thankyou, Yurong, and Yuxiang, for the wonderful night/morning talk we had, and I forgive you for stealing my blankie through the night. Even though I was freezing cold at 6am in the morning, all is forgiven, because you two made prom night amazing. <3

Nobody, no matter how bitchy or screwed up you think she is, and no matter what shit she's done to you, deserves to be treated like that.

PROM

2011-11-28T11:57:00.001+08:00

Moving on,

PROM NIGHT IS FINALLY HERE!

And I just hope that tonight will be as magical as I've always expected it to be.

If I had a younger sister,

2011-11-28T11:49:00.003+08:00

If I had a younger sister,

I would never let her feel as if she were inadequate, like she wasn't good enough to be my sister.

I would cherish every single thing she does for me, even the smallest things like calling me to ask if I want dinner, or if I'm joining the family for some event.

I would make sure she's always happy, not just faking a smile so that our parents don't ask any questions.

I would never make her cry because of the stupid things I say or do, and I would be there to pick her up when she falls, whether literally, emotionally, mentally, or even spiritually.

I would let her know that she's beautiful, instead of always picking on her size or image or clothes, and I would never ever let her think she isn't perfect the way she is.

But, I don't have a younger sister. I'm stuck with two older brothers, who would never do all these things for me. In fact, they'd do the exact opposite.

You can apologise all you want through letters or texts or emails or whatever, but words are just words, and your actions simply contradict your words.

2011-11-25T22:55:00.001+08:00

I finally cleared my room, meaning I can properly work at my desk again!
My chair can slide all the way from one end of the desk to the other, and I can walk on my steps without worrying about falling down!!!
Alsoooo, my other desk with the computer is cleannnnn and free of dust, meaning that soon I'll be able to use my own computer again! Instead of sharing the one outside with Bry!

[For those of you who have seen my room before you'll know what I mean!!]

Dress - Daniel Yem, CHECK!
Shoes - Black suede heels, CHECK!
Clutch - Silvery Black pouch, CHECK!
Jewellery - Earrings and necklace, CHECK!
I can't wait for prom right now. <3

2011-11-21T11:41:00.007+08:00

And I finally have time to be on the laptop and blog about the week!

The few most key events were sending Val and Yuxuan off, Acjc training, MBS with Xt and Ame, and dyeing my hair!

I can't really be bothered to type a lot though, so I'll just let pictures do the talking.

Butttttttt, most of the pictures are with Xt and Ame in their DSLR, so I don't have many pictures.

Firsttttttt, airport!

4 more days till Val comes back, I CANNOT WAIT!!!

We've been talking every day though, so it's not like she's isolated from all of us, but it's different! Hahaha. Apparently she went skiing. I HOPE IT SNOWS! So cool hahaha.

Okaaaay, then Ame and I went out on wednesday to dye our hair!

We started camwhoring before anything was done though.

And then, the dyeing started.

That's Ame!

And poof! The end result.

My hair isn't really obvious (Because I wanna go to ac with that kinda hair) but I think Ame's is quite noticeable!

I think my hair's the most obvious in the last picture, but if you can't see it then..

Wait till you see me in person. (:

Hmmmm, don't have pictures of our day out at MBS, but when Xt posts them I'll add them in!

It was an extremely amazing day.

Really love going out with the two of them only!!

After-prom may be the three of us only too ^^

Ac training has been... Interesting I guess.

I feel kinda noob there since everyone there is like either from Ac, Mg or Ssc, but ahwell I hope I'll get used to it soon.

The people (most of them, anyway) are kinda nice too!

I still kinda regret dsa-ing in though.

Sigh hahahaha.

2011-11-19T23:40:00.001+08:00

Didn't particularly enjoy myself at training today, I hope that it was one of those "Im-trying-to-impress-you-by-acting-as-a-jerk" kinda moments, because lets just say I was probably the most uncomfortable person there.
Maybe it's because I've always been in a girls' school so I'm not used to guys around, (well besides resonate) but ahwell, I really hope I can get to know these people soon!!!

Resonate after that was lovely though, all the stupid games and bonding stuff, I mean it was really enjoyable! And pool + koi + dinner at amk after that with Yongkit Debs David Amy Ian Bry was super fun as wellllll!
Lost to Debs and Ernie, but won Kitty and Bry! So it evens out I guess!!

Flea with Debbo Ian and maybe Kitty tomorrow, excitinggggggg!

And and, HAPPY BIRTHDAY YUXIANG AND YURONG!!! I'll never forget sec2 days with y'all, it was AMAZING, one of the few reasons why I love sec2 the most out of all four years. <3

2011-11-18T10:19:00.001+08:00

Happy birthday, I miss you.

2011-11-17T23:00:00.001+08:00

Happy birthday Tan Yu Xuan!

2011-11-16T22:32:00.001+08:00

Why am I finding it so hard to be happy?

2011-11-16T08:21:00.001+08:00

We all have friends that our parents disapprove of, but somehow those are the ones we love the most.

Reflection

2011-11-15T10:54:00.001+08:00

I am officially the most bored olevel-complete-r on earth!!!
It sucks finishing o's when all your closest friends haven't, because you have nobody to share your joy with!
But well, while waiting for Dawson and Ellie to arrive, I walked from ion to ps to kill time, and then I (as usual) started thinking about everything haha!

The walk, and people giving out flyers outside ps, really reminded me of ccis 3 years ago. I didn't really understand the meaning of it then. I mean yeah, I knew I was spreading the gospel, but I didn't know why, or anything. I just thought it was a fun way to spend Christmas with my friends. But now thinking back, I realize that it was truly one of the proudest moments of my life. I mean, winning a medal or getting straight A's, you can forget that after a few weeks. But changing someone's life and sharing the Christmas story with them, that's really.. Idk. Cool. And now, if I had the chance to do it again, I always wonder if I'll say yes or no. Because as much as I hate to admit it, I've grown to be a person afraid of society, afraid of others' perceptions. And will that hinder me from doing what God wants me to do? I think so. Which is not a good thing. Last year's ccis was good too, I mean helping with the boards and stuff, but like, it wasn't as personal. It wasn't really reaching out to others, more like just helping out in the background. Which is important as well, not saying it isn't, but, three years ago will always be really meaningful I guess.

Also, seeing as I'm STILL waiting for them, (it's not their fault, I'm super early) I realised that it's not as scary as I thought to be alone. My insecurities have always prevented me from going out alone, even to the bathroom and stuff, I've never felt comfortable alone. But today was surprisingly.. Interesting. Like I actually enjoyed the time I had to reflect and think about stuff on my own, without anyone else influencing my thoughts or opinions. So Sher, if you're reading this, let's stop our insecurities from screwing our lives up okay!

I was talking to Sher about some stuff yesterday and I finally saw how judgmental I'd been towards a certain someone. I never gave her a chance to tell me or show me how she wanted to change, and how he could actually make her happy, despite the several moments that he's ruined her. I'm sorry I immediately judged him without getting to know him, I'm sorry for always turning you down when you gave me an opportunity to get to know the two of you together. I guess on my part I just always wanted the best for you, and I never considered that he could be the best for you after all.

Well my emo reflection time is up, but it was fun while it lasted. Just a few pictures from past ccis' to lighten the mood if you actually read this long rant. (:

Bq memories

2011-11-14T21:34:00.001+08:00

Loved the time spent with Kellio Brenana and Jinbo today!!!
(Kellie Brennan and Weijin)
Really brought back many memories that I'll always hold close to my heart!
Sad that Debbo couldn't come because she was sick, get well soon cuz!
Was supposed to spend the day out with her today but.. ): Ahwell!
Another time!
There'll be many more opportunities because O'S ARE FINALLY OFFICIALLY OVER HEHEHE.
Training tomorrow spoils the whole holiday mood but ah, pray that the training goes smoothly and I don't make any enemies before I even join the squad hahahaha!

It's the 14th today right.
So HAPPY BIRTHDAY TABITHA!
The memories of you being so patient and kind and caring to me even when my brothers were being annoying assholes will always be remembered!! (:
Love you cuz!!!
(This was the only solo picture I have with her!!!)

2011-11-14T10:29:00.000+08:00

O LEVELS ARE FREAKIN' OVERRRRRRRRRRRR!

Now to decide where we go next.

Sherilyn's bimbotic moments.

2011-11-14T07:11:00.001+08:00

1 and a half hours before the paper...
Sher: Test me test me!!
Me: How do catalyst increase rate of reaction?
Sher: I know! It creates an alternative pathway for.... Uhm...
Me: Mhmmmm?
Sher: Aiya, you know, mcq... There are four options for me to choose from, so... Yeah. Next question?

1 hour before the paper..
Sher: Ey Hi Janelle!
-Mrs Tan walks past-
Mrs Tan: Good morning.
Me: Good morning Mrs Tan.
-Mrs Tan walks away-
Sher: OMG I WAS SAYING HI TO JANELLE EY, THEN THAT AUNTY SUDDENLY SAY GOOD MORNING TO ME!!!
Me: That.. Aunty?
Sher: Ya, aunty what.
Me: SHERILYN THAT WAS MRS TAN!
Sher: Huh.. Who's Mrs Tan?

<3

Tyx

2011-11-13T22:31:00.001+08:00

(Im just ranting here, so you should really just skip this.)
Yknow the only reason they lie to you is that they don't want you to know how much other people dislike you. They try so hard to think of excuses so that you won't find out, yet you keep digging holes for them to fall into so that they don't have a choice. They're probably the two kindest and most caring people I've ever met in the whole of stmargs, and this is how you treat them? I'm tired of all the shit you put them through. You did the same in primary school, you're freaking 16 (almost) already, and you're still as immature as before. Give them a break, and do yourself a favour. Grow up.

Contacts

2011-11-13T21:10:00.001+08:00

Hohoho, planning where to go with Debs Kell Jin & Bren tomorrow,
really miss the old bq times when the 5 of us used to have so much fun in the upper floor of 1100, learning God's word!
Miss you Brenana!

Andddd,
THE KL TRIP IS ON!
Probably the last Leong-Chua holiday that's gonna take place, and hopefully the most memorable one because we'll never (hopefully) forget this. <3

Church today was fun,
Ammiel smashed the cake into WeiChiang's faceeee.
Girls reaction: PIMPLESSSSS! ):
Guys reaction: Woahh, luckily not my birthday today.
Adults reaction: SIAN, MUST SWEEP THE FLOOR.
Hahahahaha!!

Headed to Thomson to buy contacts!!!
Collecting them probably next week woohoo! ((:

On a sidenote.
The race just started and......
I'm not watching it. ):

2011-11-12T23:58:00.001+08:00

SO MANY PEOPLE'S BIRTHDAYS TODAY!!!
So happy birthday to all of you,
especially Weichiang, Jelaine and RuoHan!
(That's the only picture I can find of me and Chiang, that's the nicest picture I can find of me and Jelaine (+Yasiar's totally glam face ^^) and I don't have pictures of me and RuoHan!!)

Love

2011-11-12T22:42:00.001+08:00

Grahhhhhzxzxzxzxzx.
You don't know how hard I'm trying to love you.

Friends

2011-11-12T21:41:00.001+08:00

[In the past week or so]
I've been emoji-war-ing SarahK on whatsapp,
I've been receiving good morning texts from Valerie,
I've been texting Sherilyn about practically anything and everything,
I've been pretending to be angry with Alice for no reason (with one exception),
I've been laughing about everything with Jub,
I've been cheering up Peebaoyu (or vice versa),
I've been going all crazy and childish with the resonaters.

I love my friends. (:

After o's is gonna be packed, or the first week anyway!!
Can't plan so far ahead hehehe.
So Monday I'm going out with Kell Debs Jin Bren,
Tuesday there's dental, then acjc training, then airport to send off Val,
Wednesday there's hair salon-ing with Dawson and odds BBQ,
Staying over till Thursday where there's bowling farewell,
Friday there's the going out with Xintian and Dawson all around Singapore!
Saturday will probably be resonate + going out FINALLY with them,
Sunday might be tabletennis with the cousins, church, and family stuff!!

After that I'm a lonely soul though. Not to mention that Valerie is practically disappearing for 10 days so I'll have nobody to spazz with haha!
Ahwellll hopefully I'll go and buy a dress + shoes for prom though.
I'm running outta time!!

Till then,
I'll be studying for chem mcq!
Adios!
(Heh who am I kidding, I'm gonna be slacking.)

2011-11-11T23:43:00.001+08:00

Promises aren't meant to be broken, no matter how small or insignificant they might be.

BBQ

2011-11-11T19:18:00.001+08:00

Having a BBQ right now in complete darkness because the security guards refuse to turn on the lights before 7:15, and it's 7.10 now. HAHA.

Kinda wish odds were still having a BBQ but ahwell cuddling with pizza and movies is fine too I guess!

Physics paper 1 is over, which means, ONE MORE PAPER TO FREEDOM YAWWWWWWWW. <3

Debbo Debbo where are you,
come join me at the BBQ!!!

Moving on,

2011-11-09T20:44:00.001+08:00

Less than a month after, you moved on.

You are beautiful

2011-11-09T20:43:00.001+08:00

Perhaps you've never complained to me about it before, but I can tell. No matter, whether you admit it or not, you feel it too. You just never voice it out. But I just wanted to say, no matter how you look, no matter what anyone or everyone says about you, you are so beautiful to me.

You are beautiful, no matter what they say. Words won't bring you down.

You.

2011-11-08T23:19:00.001+08:00

Do you know how many girls there are in society with anorexia or bulimia?

Do you know how many people hate themselves because they feel they aren't beautiful enough to love themselves?

Maybe you do, but you think they're just silly teenage girls who are doing silly things to be pretty.

But no, not all of them are. Some actually do it because of people like you who tell them that they aren't good enough being themselves.

You, with your words like knives and swords and weapons that you use against me. You, knocked me off my feet again, got me feeling like nothing.

2011-11-08T14:40:00.001+08:00

Three months.
And I'm still torturing myself.

2011-11-07T21:41:00.002+08:00

SELAMAT HARI RAYA HAJI!

Hahahahahaha.

My dad is so proud of himself because he knows what hari raya haji is about.

And he was trying to show off,

so he asked my mum, "You know meh!!!"

And then my mum told him everything about it.

My dad was like, "Eh. You also know ah."

Then he was so sad about it.

HAHAHAHA.

Geek family.

Lost my wallet today,

but found it 1 hour later after rushing to and fro singapore.

Really thank God, couldn't have done it without Him. (:

Sorry for pungseh-ing y'all, Sarah Kiana Dawson!

All the best to the history girls tomorrow~~~

2011-11-07T13:51:00.001+08:00

I FOUND MY LOST WALLET.
I might be 60 bucks poorer but I don't care.
Thankyou, singaporeans, for being money-minded but not heartless.
Feel like the happiest girl on earth right now.

Tabletennis

2011-11-07T07:35:00.001+08:00

Off to the cousin's house for pancake breakfast + renewing of my love for tabletennis.
I really, really, really hope that I do not get trashed by my little cousin.
My 20 year old brother did though,
which makes me feel kinddaaa scared...

Oh.
And I had a super vivid dream last night, and as scary as it might be, I really wished that it came through. ):

History kids

2011-11-06T19:28:00.001+08:00

All the friends are busy studying for pure geog or elect history or both,
which leaves me partying alone!
Even Sherilyn the bimbo is studying for physics already!!
I should get it in my head that my o's aren't over yet. Tsk.

On a sidenote.
My p3 cousin just laughed at me for playing Bakery Story.
Whoops.

2011-11-06T00:22:00.001+08:00

AND.
Lovelovelove the dress + heels I wore today btw, super comfy!
Although the heels killed my toes because they were oh-so-freaking-high, it was still fun!!
Thanks Jub for helping me choose what to wear!

Chiang's 21st!

2011-11-05T23:56:00.001+08:00

Soooo,
Chiang's party was a blastttt!
The Gee performance by Resonate was AWESOME but the video somehow got deleted, annoying! ):
Ahwell.
There was like a photobooth sorta thing, and there were wigs and stuff all around, so as usual, we all camwhored like crazy. Hehe!
Most are with Kell so I'll just put up 1!
Happy EARLY Birthday Chiang,
hopefully tonight was unforgettable for you, as it was for the rest of us!

2011-11-05T14:05:00.001+08:00

I spent 45mins trying to do Weichiang's card.
And I'm not even half done omg.
Kill me now.

2011-11-05T09:07:00.003+08:00

Sooooo,
Tabitha's party was cancelled,

as far as my family's concerned,

due to her grandfather's condition.

Really really pray that he'll be fine,

they're so strong, it's amazing.

Thinking about how to go to resonate + Weichiang's party one after another,

how do I wear my dress + heels + 13 + songlyrics to resonate?!

Maybe I should do that after...

Hm. Hahahaha.

Spent like $1230984598713 yesterday,

(including the money my parents spent on me)

ahahahaha so guilty, not gonna go shopping for a long long time.

Anyway so yeap, this was me on the carousel in suntec!

It's not as innocent as it looks, despite the teddy bear.

I ALMOST DIED OKAY.

Had to rest there for like 10 mins after that just waiting for my world to stop spinning HAHA.

Mmmm, finally cleared Val Yuxuan Alice Xintian and Jesselyn's present,

and part of Weichiang and Kitty's!

Really hope they'll like their presents because we walked like 100km to get all that stuff kay.

Hahaha!

I'm in love with Bubbles.

She is so precious. <3

2011-11-04T20:16:00.001+08:00

Why bother asking for an opinion when you aren't gonna consider it anyway?

Town

2011-11-04T17:14:00.001+08:00

IT'S OVER!
(Minus Chinese and Paper 1)
But whatever.
ITS OVER IT'S OVER IT'S OVER!!!!!
Went to town with Dawson today,
omg it's the most I've ever walked in town!!!!
(Well minus ccis hehehe.)
So here goes the adventure.

We went to 313 first, collected her specs, bought stuff from HMV, then went to cine to look for stuff, couldn't find it, went to eat lunch, went back to 313 to HMV again, then went to cine, then went back to 313, then headed to ngeeann city sephora, couldn't find stuff, went to Ion, saw Ariella + Yasiar (Yes it's on purpose) + Rachel, shopped at sephora, FINALLY FOUND WHAT WE WERE LOOKING FOR, then went to suntec to look for stuff, couldn't find, then back to cine, bought a poster for Kitty, and now we're stoning because we can't fin Chiang's present.

IS IT THAT HARD TO FIND A POSTER OF EMMA WATSON?!
Omggggggggggg.
My legs are killing meeeeeeeee.
Well on the plus side,
we found presents for Jess and Kitty!
Anddddd,
we sat on that carousel thingy in suntec!!
Mind you, everyone stared at us but I couldn't be bothered about the stares because I was too dizzy hahaha!

Okay, my adventure resumes.
Off to find Emma Watson.

Determination and Discipline

2011-11-04T06:10:00.001+08:00

Woahhhhh,
really salute those people who stay up till late at night/early in the morning just to study.
I mean, to force yourself to study till like 4am, that's just pure motivation and determination!

Ahahaha, and I complain about not getting my 8 hours of sleep.
Okehhhhh spoiltkid95 oops.

In 3 and a half hours I'll be free.
And I'm going shopping.
Ehehehehehe.

Xt and Dawson

2011-11-03T21:00:00.001+08:00

XinTian and Dawson came to my house today, unfortunately without Bubbles. ): Hahaha!
Wasn't all that productive but not bad I think! For me anyway, since I DIDN'T SLEEP hehehehe.
Borrowing heels from Val's sister and Ame's sister because I have no black heels to go with my dress for Saturday!
Hopefully it's not too high though keke.

Ss is such a boreeeee, but IM FREE AFTER TOMORROW!!
Okeh not really I have Chinese and mcqs but, that's in a week!
So, YES IM FREE hehehehe.
Haven't decided what to get Tabitha Kell Kitty or Chiang!
Not to mention I haven't gotten Jess anything too!
That makes 5 resonators who's birthdays are coming/have passed and I haven't given them presents yet ):
Maybe I'll bake for them. Hm.
Tabitha's Kitty's and Weichiang's are the most important though, since they're 21 this year!
Oh what'd I give if I could turn 21 tomorrow.
Free from o's and a's,
and hopefully I'll be in newyork studying by then. (:

2011-11-03T19:00:00.001+08:00

Soooooooooo,

I can just see it now.

Prom night.

It wouldn't be the 5 of us,

it's gonna be 4+1.

Because they all have something in common,

that I don't.

And I don't blame them for it,

it isn't their fault,

it's mine.

Physics p2

2011-11-02T23:23:00.001+08:00

Physics paper 2 was... Well, better than Prelims. But I'm not really sure about loads of stufffff.
The either/or question wasn't very hard though so that's good.
Just hope paper 1 will be easier!!!

Geog this morning was fine I feel!!
ANNOYED THAT ONLY PURE QUESTIONS CAME OUT,
but I think I did okay for development!!
Rivers and Coasts might kill me but, ahwell.

Happy birthday

2011-11-02T19:42:00.001+08:00

OH!
Forgot to say this yesterday.
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY KITTY!!!
AND.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KELLIECHUA!
Resonate wouldn't be Resonate without you. <3

Bubbles

2011-11-02T18:17:00.001+08:00

I CANT STAND IT!!!
BUBBLES HAS GOT TO BE THE CUTEST DOG ALIVE!!!!
Well, minus scruffy.
But still!!!
Omg I used to be really really scared of any kind of animal but Bubbles is the only dog/pet of any kind that I dare to touch!!!!!
Dawson and I even went to XinTian's house specially to play with her.
BE HONOURED YOU LITTLE DOGGY!

Dancing in circles

2011-11-01T18:46:00.001+08:00

Why do we go dancing in circles
when we know
it never ends
we come so close to loving each other and then
we go dancing in circles again.

Chem and amathp2

2011-11-01T17:39:00.001+08:00

9 Down, 7 To Go.
Just passed the halfway mark.

Amath today was about a hundred times better than yesterday,
but well, 0 marks x 100 is still 0 marks!
Hehe.
Chem paper was good though, I thought.
Howeverrrr everyone else says it was hard sooo, ah, I'm weird. ):
Not gonna think about it.
Geog and Physics tomorrow,
And FINALLY my first break ever since emath paper1 on Thursday.
Then it's ss and I'm OFF TO PARTY!
(:
Oh andddd, Tabitha's birthday celebration is on the 5th as well, which means two 21st birthday parties on the same day!!
How cool is that hahaha!

maybe I should try being a little less obvious.

AliciaTanJeanYee

2011-10-31T22:01:00.001+08:00

芯仪心有嘉, 嘉心有芯仪! <3

Amath p1

2011-10-31T16:40:00.001+08:00

Amath was so bad that even if I didn't write anything down, I'd probably get the same marks.

To the people I ignored after the paper,
I'm really sorry, I just didn't feel like talking.

Keyboard

2011-10-30T21:12:00.001+08:00

Seriously, don't you ever listen?
A no is a no is a no is a no.

Amath p1

2011-10-30T19:58:00.001+08:00

Church today was... Church.
I was looking forward to WeiChiang's party before, but now I'm not so sure.
With o's in the way, and being the only one (+Amelia Dorothy Ethan) having to go through all of it, I feel kinda lost.
Couldn't celebrate Kitty's birthday, couldn't learn the SNSD dance with them, not gonna go to the Chua's this week because of my papers..
Idk. Makes me feel like I don't belong again.
Hopefully the feeling will fade. :/

On a sidenote,
My "boyfriend" always knows what to say to make me laugh.
How fitting, especially since math is tomorrow!!
I know the picture's crooked but I can't change it on the iPhone!!
HAHAHA.

Scared

2011-10-30T09:31:00.001+08:00

I was just talking to Jillian about one of my many irrational fears.
And she's so annoying. ):

2011-10-29T21:51:00.001+08:00

Oh gosh it's snowing in newyork now?!
Well that's what news 5 tonight says.

"What would I give, if I could live, out of these waters?" Little Mermaid - Part Of Your World

2011-10-29T14:44:00.003+08:00

18 more days for you,

I just know you can do it.

You're definitely strong enough.

You have the almighty God on your side.

You're gonna make it through alllllllllll the way.

Have confidence in yourself, in your effort, in our God.

Please, that's all I ask of you.

2011-10-29T14:32:00.001+08:00

So I have three papers on monday,

lit paper 1, paper 2, and amath paper 1.

But I'm slacking.

Tumblring.

Watching tv.

Goodluck, Joanne.

I'm sure you're gonna get your straight A's this way.

Dan and Serena

2011-10-28T22:12:00.001+08:00

I think the only reason why I'm so in love with Dan and Serena + Penn and Blake is because I can't find my own happy ending, so I resort to wanting other people to be happy. And for a while there, yeah, their happiness makes me feel happy too, but deep inside I know I'm still alone, I'm not that happy, actually I'm not happy at all, because I'm not over you yet.

Emath p2

2011-10-28T20:57:00.001+08:00

I didn't like the fact that they already had expectations,
Like my marks were expected,
not an accomplishment,
just the norm,
something that I haven't been living up to for a long time.
But you can't always get what you want, and what you like.
We just gotta move on with life.

So, all my single afternoon papers have been cleared, now it's just left with the next killer week, and I'm free.
Okay minus Chinese and Paper1s.
Emath today was alright~
Harder than yesterday, I felt, but most people seem to think that today's was easier. Ah, we'll see how it goes.
I've loved spending the mornings with Alicia and Amelia, walking to coro, disturbing Val, basically just doing stuff to keep ourselves occupied before the paper.
I couldn't have survived those long dreadful morning, so thankyou, to the two of you.

To my dearest little girl,
不要哭了! "世上无难事,只怕有心人!" 我相信你肯定能够拿到你想取到的成绩! 小妹妹不要伤心了, 继续笑哈哈, 我爱你!

2011-10-27T23:40:00.001+08:00

A very sudden and random message to my fellow Leong,
Not my twin, but the other one, that sits behind me (Whether in class or in the exam hall, both.)
To be completely honest with you, when tjl changed your seats and you were placed behind me, I was unsure about every group work that was gonna take place.
I thought that you were really playful and thought that I might get influenced by you, so I was really scared.
But as time passed and we started doing more and more assignments together, I realised that everything I thought of you was wrong.
You aren't playful, you're actually really hardworking.
You aren't very cool and cold towards people, you're actually really fun-loving.
You didn't distract me at all, in fact you made me more focused on the tasks assigned.
Sorry for judging you the first time I saw you, and not giving you a chance to show who you really are.
I've enjoyed every English/ss/science group work with you, together with Alice and Sherilyn/Mindy.
O's are here, and idk if you've decided whether you wanna go to jc or poly,
but I just wanted to let you know that you'll always be my fellow Leong,
and I'll support you in whichever decision you make!
Forget about the past three papers and just look forward!!
You can do it, I know you can!
<3

2011-10-27T23:19:00.001+08:00

I miss the two of you.
Even though in school I act like everything's fine and fun, but,
I really really miss the two of you.
Can't really explain it.
It was joyous while it lasted though, extremely. <3

Emath p1

2011-10-27T23:17:00.001+08:00

Emath paper today was... Fine.
Checked my answers with the one online and my marks were... Pleasing enough I guess! Gotta try and be contented with everything I have!

Celebrated Val's birthday before the paper, so funnnnn!
Everybody was like busy studying and stuff but we were laughing and screaming (and disturbing everybody else) hahahaha sorry.
But I really enjoyed myself this morning before the paper so yeah!
Love you Valval!

Happy birthday Val!

2011-10-26T00:38:00.001+08:00

Those two girls are so pretty right, but this girl is the prettiest, both inside and out!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VALERIE LIM LI HUI!
You've always been the craziest kuku I know, laughing and smiling practically every single minute! It's hard not to be happy around you! (: I really really hope we'll go to AC together because life will be much happier with you around. (:
Thanks for always encouraging me and comforting me, especially when I fight with your bestfriend! You're really one of the kindest people I know, loving everyone around you no matter what they've done to you.
Forget about the English paper, it was yesterday! Let it be! Concentrate on the other papers, and ace them like I know you will!
I'm really proud to have a friend like you, and yknow I love you very much right! <3
LIFE GOES ON! LGO, YOU DDG! ^^
HAPPY SWEET SIXTEENTH!!!!

2011-10-26T00:08:00.001+08:00

Andandand. Apparently there might be a chance that Serena and Dan get back together! Hahahaha gotta love the two of them, they're destined for each other!!!

2011-10-26T00:07:00.001+08:00

ASHLEY BENSON IS SO PRETTYYYYYY.
Okay I don't watch PLL but still.
Ahhhhhhhhhhh. <3

2011-10-25T14:30:00.001+08:00

Okay so at first I thought that Bry was gay, but now I think he's actually homophobic.
He screamed in disgust when he saw Kurt and Blaine kissing, and then whenever he hears Kurt singing he'll be like "Eeeeeek! Don't wanna hear it!"
And then we were just watching X-Factor the UK one, and this gay (I think) guy was singing and he was cringing again hahahaha.

Just came back from Clementi with Dawson after literature consultation, the amount of confidence that Ms Noraini has in us is really... Motivating.
And encouraging!!
Can't wait for this week to end!
So exciting!
Love o's. (I'm just psyching myself here.)

2011-10-24T21:13:00.002+08:00

Ohohohohoh I forgot something very important!

Thanks for being you, Jub!

I really really really thank God for you.

english o's

2011-10-24T20:37:00.003+08:00

So today I wasn't really freaking out before english because I think after seeing all of resonate go through it, it doesn't seem so scary or daunting to me.

BUT THEN.

_ was like, "Ey Jo! Why aren't you freaking out!"

Then I said, "Huh, freak out for what?"

AND THEN SHE SAID,

"Oh, I know, because you're already accepted to AC right, so you can get 20 points. Haha, but I want to get 6 points, so I'm quite scared."

Wtheck luh, just because I'm not going crazy like her doesn't mean I'm not scared of doing badly, I just don't like telling the whole world I'm scared because there isn't a point, to me.

And just because I've been accepted doesn't mean I don't wanna get 6 points either!!!!

And then after the paper, she asked me how it was,
and I said, "Uh, okay luh, I don't really care about it anymore."
(BECAUSE IT'S OVER ALREADY.)

AND THEN SHE SAID (AGAIN),

"Hahaha oh yeah. Because if you get C6 it'll be okay."

iuhjnafspcikmwaeidusvfhjnbkwa!

I was really really pissed with her luh.

I mean, okay, I get that she's dying to get 6 points, I understand that she wants to get it really badly.

But why does she have to keep saying that it's okay for me to get a C6?!

Urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Okay.

Other than that girl making me so annoyed,

I'm quite okay with everything that happened today!

English was quite alright, I mean it wasn't easy-easy, but I didn't find it very hard either,
so thank God really!

Andddddd. Dana was so cute today!

Normally when we see each other, she'll be like "Bobo!"

And I'll be like, "Chaaaaaang!"

BUT, today, she passed by me and was like,

"Chaaaaaan- Ey. Wrong name. BOBO!"

Hahahahahaha so cute la. :D

Was supposed to go to serene with Xintian and Dawson but my parents came to pick me up instead, so after going to Xintian's house (and getting raped by her dog) I went back home!

Bubbles is such a licker.

She's the first dog I actually don't mind!

Me: Is she a girl or boy?

Dawson: Check if she has a _!

Me: No, I shall ask her.

Xintian: SHE WONT ANSWER YOU.

Me: Idc. Bubbles, if you are a boy, bark once. If you are a girl, bark twice.

*Bubbles looks up at me, stares at me, and then licks me.*

Thanks Bubbles.

So here's a rather blurred picture of me and Bubbles.

So cute, isn't she!

Since I'm posting pictures I decided to add in some others~
This is a SNSD calendar that I bought for Alice!

She was squealing and giggling like a little girl (that she actually is) when she got it!

So cute HAHA. But yesyes, I'm such a good deskmate, no?

Hmmm, picture taken in front of the F1 tracks!

Told Beatrice that I love this picture because it made me look skinneh hehehe!

Me and TauSuan!

And thennnn, our half-class!

Jac Hana Lakeisha Joan JieHui Nat Joan Cher Tausuan JoLow Val Me Alice Cass!

Anddddd of course, birthday girl!!!

Well, the middle one anyway.

Happy Seventeenth, Cuz!

Lastly, Valval!

Don't be sad about English anymore okeh!

I'm sure you'll do well because you're really really smart,

and just focus on your other subjects now kay!

No point worrying about stuff when it's over!

Lovelove!

To all of you who actually read till here,

don't worry about english anymore!

IT'S OVER!

NO MORE SITUATIONAL WRITING FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES!

(WELL UNLESS YOU BECOME A ENGLISH TEACHER.)

BUT YEAH.

LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE!

:DDDDDDDDDDDDD

2011-10-24T10:27:00.001+08:00

Suddenly everything becomes about kpop. And I can't be bothered to even try and understand.

Ugly during English

2011-10-23T22:43:00.001+08:00

I'm gonna look like an ugly bitch tomorrow because my eyes are all red and puffy but whatever.
Great way to start my first paper.

2011-10-23T21:33:00.001+08:00

Sometimes I wish that I was insecure about my looks and was obsessed with being skinny so that I'll go on a diet and starve myself and become skinny.

Then I'll look anorexic and not have any fats, and other people around me will say, "Oh, the two brothers and one sister are all so skinny." instead of asking, "Why are her two brothers so skinny when she looks like a fat pig?"

But I'm not. I'm perfectly fine with my looks, till days like these. The days when I totally hate myself for accepting myself even though society doesn't.
Society blames girls for committing suicide due to their looks, but when we're all happily alive, they judge us and tell us we're not good enough.

When skinny ass girls complain "Aw, why am I so fat?", what do they expect the real fat girls to say?

2011-10-23T21:26:00.001+08:00

It's just one of those days where everyone calls me fat, says I'm ugly, tells me I'm not good enough.
Thanks.

Dream

2011-10-23T10:55:00.001+08:00

Last night after I finally managed to fall asleep (After playing Bakery Story for like an hour), I dreamt that I got 28 points for O's!!! Hahahahaha omg la.
Most people would be spazzing about being scared but no, I just laughed and laughed and laughed.
I think I really went crazy after my severe freak out the other day la.
Now I keep saying the wrong things and getting so distracted (by Bakery Story) and whatever.
I've gone insane.
Hahahahaha.

Moving on, o's are tomorrow!!!!
How exciting!
The day that I've waited for these past four years have FINALLY arrived!!!

Yknow why it's so exciting? Because after tomorrow, I won't have to write a narrative essay again, or do situational writing, or whatever!!
I mean yeah there's still GP in jc and I wanna do the linguistics course thingy, but well, it's still like exciting... No?

Hehehe so last night I was talking to SarahK and then I was telling her about the different groups of people there are to me!

Like there's a bunch of people that I can never be angry with,
For example, Clarice! And Wanzhen! And SarahKhoo! 

Then there's a bunch of people that I'm very very afraid of (For no reason, really)
Like Monster! (The person, not the monster itself) And _! 

And then the bunch of people I run to when I'm high-ing over something!
Like TauSuan and Kiana! 

And there are other groups that I can't think of anymore. Hahaha. Anyway, it's not just me right! I mean I'm sure y'all (whoever is bored enough to read this blog) have people like that too.
And the funny part is that the people inside the same group are actually very very different hahaha!
But idk, my mind is just like that. (:

So anyway.
I can just imagine tonight's twitter timeline to be full of "Ahhhhhhh it's tomorrow!!!" and "Goodluck to @blablabla!!" Hahahaha. We'll see.

Sherilyn, I'll be waiting in five years time. ^^

Can't sleep

2011-10-23T00:17:00.001+08:00

I can't sleeeeeepppppppppp. 

2011-10-22T23:04:00.004+08:00

I just took a little more than two hours to write a literature essay,
kill me nowwwwwwwww.

On a sidenote,

I really hope that we can go to malaysia with the chuas again!

Seeing that I was bodoh the last time we went and completely unaware about almost everything,

this time hopefully we can have muchmuch more funnnn!

And seeing that Bry's gonna enter army (On the 30th of Jan btw HAHAHAHA), and Ian's going to UK, this might probably be the last Leong-Chua holiday in a long long time!!! ):